Someone Save the Savior

I made a post a few days ago where I said I have a Savior Complex and there’s nothing I can do about it. Well, I don’t know if it’s a personal thing, an Aquarius thing or a Borderline thing or a Bipolar thing, but I have the urge to need to save people and it’s frustrating. I am a good listener, and I’ve been told I give good and reassuring advice. I can be an awesome cheerleader or an honest bitch, depending on the conversations need. But this “Savior Complex” is probably gunna be the death of me. Eventually. I’m not suicidal, but the thought is always there and eventually guilt is gunna catch up to me and suffocate me. How can someone poor, on Welfare and as a SAHM help the world?

I want to make a difference. I want to cheer people up. I want to end sadness and make everything roses and rainbows. I get frustrated by all these groups and websites with their forums of people complaining and venting about their days and situations and I read them all, going from being happy about being alive, to being brought down to earth at crashing speeds into a deep depression after reading the sadness, bitterness and anger that is most of their lives on there. How does one deal with that? How does one rescue people, when one can’t even rescue themselves first? I continue to be a member of these groups for myself to ask questions and to become informed; about symptoms, medications, side effects, etc. But people are now using the groups and forums as personal vent space and it’s rather maddening. There are blogs for that—GO write! Leave the groups for advice, not arguments, not guilt, not frustration all on the part of the reader. 

Please reassure me that I’m not the only one who thinks like this. There has to be others that go through the Savior Complex as well as the frustrations of not being able to rescue others because you can’t save yourself. I can’t be the only one. Though sometimes I feel alone. Sometimes my husband gets the S.C. too and it stresses him out like it does me. He gives up doing things for himself, just to be there for others all the time. But in my head, I feel like I’m the only one responsible for the world and all the sadness and anger in it. Sometimes I feel like I was meant to be here for that specific reason and nothing else. To take people’s pain away. It’s constantly on my mind, I need to help, I need to save, I have to give the best advice I can, I need to talk them down from suicide, I have to make them smile, I have to make them happy, I have to solve their problems, I have to, I have to, I have to! Maybe it’s part of my OCD. I have no idea. Do you?